when a hot person comes up to you
"hey your friend is cute"
Destiny - Character Creation
treat me like a college textbook. spend lots of money on me but never touch or look at me
no. treat me like your favorite book. keep me by your side, touch my every page, learn all my twists and turns, remember every word I say, even the ones that make you cry
*4-second-long fart noise*
two dads tell their adopted son that he is adopted
he looks at them and bursts into tears
"i thought you were my fathers … but you were just faux pas"
i am happy this post is getting notes because we need more queer representation in awful jokes
fight for social justice today; add lgbtqia people to shitty horrible groan-inducing life-ruining puns